Category Archives: Ramble

September Hiatus

Hey folks! If you're a patron over on my Patreon campaign, then you've already heard this but I probably should put it here too.

I'm taking a hiatus from writing for the month of September. I failed to get anything published on Amazon for August, and I'll probably not be publishing anything in September either. Don't worry, I'm okay. I'm doing pretty good in fact, because I finally got me a job!

I was starting to run into the burnout problem with my writing in August, partly because my parents keep invading with virtually no warning, and that's only going to get worse as the house they're building gets closer and closer to completion.  ...

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Reflection on the relationship between life and art

Several years back, I think it was around 2012 or so, long before the idea of Donald Trump becoming or even running for president ever entered the public consciousness, I had an idea for a story. It was about a public figure in the news, not so much a news anchor or a proper journalist. This was someone who was something of a pundit, though that word implies the notion of being an expert called upon to speak on a particular subject. The character was deeply inspired by people like Bill O'Reilly, Sean Hannity, Neil Cavuto, Tucker Carlson, and even the raving madness that is Alex Jones.  ...

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Follow up to previous vent blog

I had watched this earlier in the day, and I guess it churned away in my head amidst all the other things swirling around, keeping me from being able to see much other than the things about myself I don't like. It's kind of comforting to know that this is a real thing... but it's also kind of a roundabout validation that maybe I repel the people in my life.

Anyway, here's Wonderwall...  ...

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Vent blog post - feel free to ignore

I've not been in the best of mindsets lately. Part of it stems from the parents visiting. They don't even have to do anything overtly damaging. Mom isn't so bad. She understands to a certain extent that A) I'm an adult and B) she can't force herself into my life if I don't want it. Dad on the other hand is completely oblivious to the emotional needs of the people around him, to the point where he doesn't get that a supposed joke he might find funny is in fact rather insulting. Any extended period of time around him is a serious risk to my self-esteem long term.  ...

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I need help, but I can't get any

There's a lot that I don't know. I make no delusions about that, to myself or anyone else. So it's pretty frequent that I come up against a task I don't know how to complete or a project I don't know how to tackle. I might try to muddle my way through, search the internet for guides or resources, but that only gets me so far.

Because I'm a fucking dolt.

I've lost count of the times where I attempted something and found I didn't know what to do. Nothing I did brought me anywhere near the result I wanted. All my iterations and attempts were met with failure.  ...

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Sleep Schedule Shift

Over the last several months, I've been trying to get myself to wake up at a more reasonable hour. There were days where I had ended up staying up until three or four in the morning and then I'd be in bed until noon or later. It seemed fun initially, but over time, I got sick of it. I got tired of missing out on most of the day. I hate that I'm on a completely different schedule to the rest of the world. So I started using my alarm clock again (specifically an app on my phone). For a while, I would wake up with it, or I would just ignore it, but then something changed.  ...

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For those who need this (myself included)

My friend Riddle was streaming for the first time in a few days. He'd had technical difficulties and he managed to overcome them at long last. While we were all watching him draw, chatting with him, he linked the chat to a tumblr post that I felt like might be a very good thing to share, even if it's only ten or so people reading this.

Seriously, this is an important bit of text that reading through can help in ways you might not realize until you actually have a look through it.

Also, go give Wil Wheaton some love.  ...

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Surmounting Lassitude

I have a hard time starting work. This doesn't mean getting up in the morning and going to a job. Hah, I don't have one! Be jealous of my lack of sustaining income ye wage slaves! (what I wouldn't give to have a steady occupation). What I mean is I'll have a daily goal set for myself, let's say writing so many words. I know I can do it. I've proven that I can. I have a mountain of content I've created that speaks to the fact that I am capable of such a feat.

I'm not even talking about starting a project.  ...

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Random Late Night Thought - Star Trek Edition

When you look at everything that goes on across the whole of the franchise, from TOS to Discovery, even including the novels and other non-cannon source material, you'd think that there would be far more cases of mental breakdown among Starfleet officers than you see.

There are episodes where officers mind-meld. Their bodies rapidly age or they're turned into children again. They end up sharing a body with an alien consciousness. Sometimes there's a need to temporarily play host to an alien symbiant like what goes on with the Trill. What if you encounter a probe that makes you live out an entire lifetime in an alien culture within the span of just under an hour?  ...

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I'm such a shitty ally

There's a comedian by the name of Craig Ferguson. He's Scottish, used to host the Late Late Show, and has done a fair bit of voice work. In one of his standup specials, he talks about people converting to Catholicism. He jokes about how these converted Catholics feel like they need to make up for only turning to the faith later in life by being "extra catholic". It's a terribly funny bit where he demonstrates a convert's overzealous enthusiasm at practicing the faith to the point of becoming obnoxious to life-long Catholics.

I kinda feel like that's where I am.

It wasn't until I was in my mid to late twenties that I realized "Oh, hey, you know how you like girls?  ...

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Vent blogging

This is just me prattling on about my own sorry self. If you have no interest in the self-deprecation of some rando on the internet, then by all means, give this a pass.

If you choose to continue, be forewarned, some of this might bring up some less than pleasant feelings. I believe the appropriate term is 'trigger warning' no?

Alright, last warning, from here on, you are treading into the unkind ramblings of my mind.

I hate it when I feel this way. I know my brain is just being a dick to me, but I can't help it. I don't know how to stop my brain from thinking these things.  ...

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A letter to my dad

I've been a big fan of Stephen Colbert for a long time. Not that long ago, he had the cast of Queer Eye on the Late Show and I enjoyed their collective interview. It was something I didn't know I needed in my life. I had dismissed the show as 'just more reality television' because it wasn't science fiction or animated or stand up comedy or a number of other things I'm interested in. And because I tend to stay as far away from reality television as I can. After the interview, I decided to give the show a chance.

I've recently completed season one.  ...

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Jar-Jar Binks didn't deserve the hate he got

Today started off like pretty much any other Saturday for me. Lazy morning, woke up later than probably I should have, grabbed the laptop and tooled around on there for a bit, checked twitter and a few websites to see what I had missed. I got up, pulled the sheets off the bed to throw them in the washer because I try to wash them every week. It's a ritual I use to try and stave off acne since I have issues with breakouts if I'm not fastidious about it. Also, happiness is just getting out of a steamy shower in the dead of winter and climbing into bed with freshly laundered sheets.  ...

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